“Then Jesus told his disciples, ‘If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.’” Matthew 16:24 (ESV)
Have you ever listened to the description of how most ladies describe who they are when they meet someone new? Or how someone else describes you when they are introducing you to someone else?
It is usually a breakdown of who you know. wife of…, mother of…, daughter of……., sister of……., co-worker of……., or friend of……
Where does this come from? IDENTITY. We want to be identifiable. We all want to know that we’re relatable somehow to someone or something of importance. At least this has been true for myself.
For almost my entire life, I wrapped up my identity in everyone else around me.
Can you relate?
Maybe so or maybe not.
Growing up, a member of our family stayed in constant “big letter” word TROUBLE. He was lost and I was blind to see him as Jesus saw him. Sadly, I didn’t have Jesus like I do now to understand this perspective and Truth.
Instead for me back then, his troubled life felt like our whole entire family’s identity!! Trouble was what we were known for. At least that is how most others viewed us. I wasn’t known for being Nichole, BUT known for being related to this person. So of course being related to this person means that most people think the whole family has issues. Trouble issues.
But God is still God so my journey continued…..
At only eighteen years of age, I married my sweet husband Eric. This June, we will celebrate 21 years of marriage. How awesome is that!?! Pretty awesome I think but boy oh boy, marriage has not been a walk in the park. I would honestly have to say that this last year of our marriage has been the sweetest.
You see, for the first couple of years of our marriage, I tried to find my whole identity in him. If you’ve been married for even a short time, or even had a boyfriend for that matter, you already know that I became very disappointed.
But God is still God so my journey continued…..
Three children later (and stair steps too – three children each one a year apart), I stayed so busy with changing diapers, making bottles, and wiping runny noses that they became my identity. I didn’t even have a moment of time to think about myself.
But God is still God so my journey continued…..
Sixteen years of marriage went by and WOW it hit me one day like a brick! Right across my face. I literally looked in the mirror and had no idea who I was anymore. I couldn’t even tell you what I enjoyed eating or doing because everything I did in life was about someone else. Have you ever woke up to find that to be true? If so, you know it is a very dark experience. Scary describes it mildly. Not just for yourself, but for everyone around you because CHOICES effect everyone.
When I found myself at this point, I spent a long while, years, on a roller coaster ride that my whole family had to ride along on. Sad but true.
But God is still God so my journey continued…
I will not get into all the details now, that day may come later, but for now you need to know if you are one of the ladies reading this and your life feels like a roller coaster ride, it does Not have to stay this way. You can make the choice I did and get off.
“But how do I do that?” you may ask.
It’s so simple that it is quite unbelievable. That is why so many of us have such a hard time getting off the roller coaster.
If you are like me, simple instructions are Not Easy.
So what did I do to get off the roller coaster?
I made the choice to find my identity in Jesus. I realized that if I had been the only person in this world, Jesus would have died on the cross for me, just me. I realized I am made in the image of God. I stopped seeing God’s Word as something for everybody and made it TRUTH for me alone.
You may say, “Hold on a minute… God’s Word is for everyone.”
Yes it is, but salvation is an individual decision. It is also an individual relationship He is looking for from me AND you. Every single one of us. Individually. Jesus wants “each” of us to follow Him and Him alone.
Matthew 16:24 states, “Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.”
Find your identity in Christ Jesus today. He will heal all your identity issues and make you whole again. I know this because He has done it for me. This does not mean that life will not have roller coaster moments. It just means that Jesus keeps you from getting sick on the ride. Jesus heals all and loves all.
God bless!! Love you all!
